Sunday, August 23, 2009

Twilight Moms Bask In Huge, Overpriced Onslaught Of Shameless Merchandising


Of course there's nothing shocking about the current merchandising avalanche for Twilight. You've got your notebooks, lunch boxes, novelizations and whatnot. All the things Twilight Moms crave. But just take this into consideration: You can now buy a Twilight-inspired dildo. It's a sparkly vampire dildo called "The Vamp." I would show it to you on this page but it is quite naughty and therefore NOT SAFE FOR WORK. In case you are away from work and want to check it out, here it is. 

According to Tantus Direct, makers of "The Vamp":

"The Vamp is a realistic form dildo based appropriately on our Sire's design but with a deathly pale flesh tone reminiscent of the new moon's glow."

Wow. Just.

Wow.

And Twilight Moms... that's not the only way to worship Edward/throw your money down the toilet, ohh no! Check out these other Twilight-related items:












Twilight Moms, listen. You're not being taken advantage of. Nooo. What it really comes down to is... well... you see...

I got nothin'.



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